The Donut Man

Ok,

So, one of my friends loves listening to Adventures in Odyssey.  As a kid, we listened to Odyssey every once in a while, but what we listened to over and over again, was the donut man.  The donut man sang fun songs, crazy songs, and quiet, worshipful songs.  He taught us Bible stories in new ways.  He taught us Bible stories that are more obscure.  Basically he made the Bible really interesting. 

Anyway, I have been on the hunt for his old albums.  Of course we had them on cassete tape, and all I have been able to find on his website in the last few years (when I check every year or so) was new CD's, some of which had the more "kosher" songs from the good old days on them.  But the songs, like the one about worms nibbling on someone's toes b/c he would not worship God, were not accessable.  I just looked tonight b/c I was talking about him and I saw it!  He has released all the original albums on CD.  I am now vowing to buy one a month and collect all of them again. 

Frustration

Today was church - I love being at my new church.  It has a great feeling about it.  I love that our pastors are around and always hanging out with people.  I love that there are some amazing parents who really love their kids.  I do get sad/frustrated/worn-out at times.  You see, our children's department is experiencing some growth - at least growth in the amount of children they have - not so much growth in the amount of helpers they have.  I have a model of ministry I believe in - it is some sort of a compilation between the values that were instilled in me at friends and the model children's worker of EGM.  All I know though is that the majority of those values are violated in so many ways during one of the Sunday Mornings that I have at my new church - it kills me!  I want to be able to lead experiential activities, I want the children to go home knowing the main idea of the lesson, not just the story.  (Although I am not even sure that was accomplished today)  I want the children to go home having responded to that real life truth, after a great real life discussion.  None of which were accomplished today.  I want to be safety conscious - to always have two adults in the room and not send children to the bathroom with just one other teacher.  I want to be relational and have the ability to be with the children rather than put out fires.   I want to have fun with the kids and really connect with the parents.  All of these things I want to be able to do.  Yet, with only one of me and 16 kids, those things just can't happen.  In the meant time I will continue to pray that more people will step up to fulfill these important roles in the lives of these amazing kids!

Why am I here?

Have you ever had one of those brief moments that jolts you out of your normally accepted life and puts you immediately into questioning what you are doing and why you are doing it?  I had prayed earlier this week because there is a huge part of me that misses living in Orange county, being with my family, being with my friends, etc.  so I had prayed that God would continue to move in me, showing me what I am doing and why I am here.  

Then tonight, I got a call...  The call made me really question why I am where I am.  I definitely feel as though God has called me to the place I am at.  That somehow this is for His glory and for my healing and sanctification.  He has given me many things out here that I had been longing for, for years.  So, as much as I want to disappear back out to the OC - I know that God is not done with me in this desert.  

I decided I would write out some of the things that I know God has called me to here.  

1.  I love the mission/vision/values of EGM.  I am not sure that I could be more aligned if I had written them myself.

2.  I love what I am doing.  There are many times when it is hard (just like every job) but God has called me to the world, not locally, and I can't deny that.

3.  I love the people I work with.  They have become family.  

4.  I love my church.  I really want to get involved and even more plugged in there.

5.  I know that God isn't calling me out yet.  He has a plan for my life out here that is clearly evident and I know that it is not time to turn-tail and run.  (As much as I would love to do that)

So, I don't know what is in store in a year and a half, for that will be when I am done with the big project I am working on.  There is a part of me I think that will always look for a way back to Orange County-to hope that around that time I get a similar phone call, but for now I am here.  Even then, I pray that God will direct me to be where he wants me to be and that He will grant me the grace to accept whatever place that is.